


You can't even light blunts in space

by coulghoul



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Awkward Keith, Bad memes, Fluff, Lance keeps falling asleep, M/M, Only mentions of weed, Sharing beds
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-13
Updated: 2016-07-13
Packaged: 2018-07-23 17:37:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,070
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7473528
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/coulghoul/pseuds/coulghoul
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After Lance is in a healing pod for record-breaking time, Keith is surprised to see him come out different.</p>
            </blockquote>





	You can't even light blunts in space

Keith was the first to stand when the healing pod door slid open. Everyone told him he was being impatient, but he didn’t give much mind to it. After Lance, _that idiot,_ almost died (again), the team was forced to stick him in one of the pods. The time it'd take was a complete mystery, but some of those injuries couldn't have been healed naturally. 

Groaning as he stumbled out, Lance collapsed against Keith, forehead bumping against his shoulder. Keith tensed, and looked back to see everyone giving him looks that said _don’t pull anything funny._ He gingerly placed a hand on the man’s lower back for support.

“Gnhnng, how long?” Lance slurred.

“Fourteen earth days,” Pidge piped up. “You were in the pod for fourteen days- longer than any of us have ever been.”

The whole room was in motion now, eager to see Lance’s state. Hunk was already crying, and started walking up towards the two to rescue Lance from his rival’s comfort.

“Uhn,” It was clear that Lance was still out of it. “Who are you people?”

Everyone froze.

Hunk’s teary laughter caught everyone off guard. “Hah, c’mon man- oh my god, you’re still hilarious as ever.”

“No bro, I’m legit. What is this place? Where am I?”

“Oh.” Hunk responded.

“I was afraid this would happen.” Everyone’s attention was turned to Coran. “As good as those healing pods are, it can’t be said that they don’t have any… side effects. It seems that prolonged exposure causes temporary amnesia, and he might be a little _off_ \- but don’t worry!” Coran supplied nervously. “Like I said, it’s all temporary- I’d give it some time. A day or two, perhaps.”

“Makes sense, I guess.” Pidge was visibly the least surprised of them all. “Well Lance, you’re in the Castle of Lions. In space.”

Lance lifted his head up with wide eyes. “Holy shit,” he whispered. “We’re in space? Holy shit, _how-_ it’s so _big.”_

Pidge and Hunk snickered. Everyone else just looked mildly concerned. Keith should’ve known better, he should’ve known that Lance normally wouldn’t be leaning on him like this- borderline _hugging_ him. Pushing Lance off, or at least setting him down, had completely slipped his mind.

Shiro cleared his throat and smiled. “Keith, would you mind taking Lance to his room? Once he’s fully recovered, we can all restart our regular training with Voltron.” There was something about Shiro’s smile that seemed a bit sinister. Keith looked to Allura for confirmation.

“Go on ahead,” she gestured. “He’s most likely filled with medicinal fluids still, so it’s good to get it out of his system with rest.”

“Alright then.” Keith started to guide Lance out, but he wouldn’t budge. He just stood with his feet firmly planted to the ground, gaping at Keith. The crew took this as a cue to leave and do what they needed to do.

“You. Your _face._ ” Keith had to assume Lance was talking about him. He kinda wanted to punch the guy back into the pods.

“What about my face?” _Do I have something on it?_

“It’s beautiful.”

_Oh. Well dang._ “Uh.”

Keith felt Lance grasp his cheeks in his palms. “My man. My guy. Bro.” Lance inhaled deeply. “Boi.” His hands were cold against Keith’s flushed face. Who the hell did this punk think he was? Why was his face so _close_. “How are you so pretty?”

It was a miracle everyone decided to leave the room earlier, otherwise Keith might’ve never lived this down. “Genetics?” Keith tried. Lance laughed, and seemed to take that as an answer.

Muttering an _up you go,_ Lance whimpered in surprise as Keith hoisted him over his shoulder. “Ughh,” Lance whined. He squirmed around in discomfort, and Keith did _not_ need a difficult Lance right now.  

Reluctantly, he adjusted Lance until he was cradling the man, almost like a baby (or in bridal style, but he refused to acknowledge the similarities). It hadn’t even been a minute before Lance’s body went lax with sleep. Starting down the path to their quarters, he was cautious of running into someone. He made sure to look both ways before crossing a hallway, just like his mother Shiro always told him to do.

“Oh? I didn’t know you were that strong, Keith.”

Keith startled and turned around to see Hunk trailing him. He continued moving, instead slowly walking backwards.

“Why are you following me?”

“Me? _Following you?_ Our rooms are all in the same place.” Hunk laughed. He didn’t sound _too_ different from usual.

Keith held Lance against him defensively, as if he could hide behind him. He choked on a surprised grunt as his back hit a wall.

Stopping a foot in front of a frozen Keith, Hunk gave him a few firm, friendly pats on the shoulder. “Be good to him, man.”

“W-What are you talking about?”

Hunk sauntered off away from their rooms smiling, affirming Keith’s suspicions that he _was_ being followed.

 

**…**

 

Being on Lance duty could be described as a chore.

  
“You’re supposed to hate me, you know.” Keith mumbled. He _thought_ that he could just take Lance to his room and be done with it, but Allura told him to ‘monitor’ him until he was better. _Monitoring? More like babysitting._  

“But why? You’re so nice to me, and your mullet is soft, and you have pretty eyes.” Lance said from his bed, cocooned in a blanket.

Keith squeaked. He definitely didn’t think Lance could be so… kind. But at the same time he did- he saw Lance like this with everyone, the rivalry being something mutually exclusive to only the two.

“And even though you dress like an emo Pokémon trainer, I think it still looks good on you.”

Keith’s face was surely heating up now. “Uh, yeah. I try.”  

They sat in silence until Lance started humming quietly, eyes barely slits. Keith thought he looked like a cat. A burrito cat. “‘M still tired,” Lance started. “And cold.”

“What am I supposed to do about that?” Keith replied dryly.

“C’mere.”

_Nope_. Keith was positively not prepared for that. And yet he climbed onto the bed anyway. It was always Lance who instigated their ridiculous arguments, so Keith guessed he didn’t have much of a problem being nice to the guy. Lance slumped into the mattress, and patted the spot next to him. Keith laid down in that spot, body stiff and symmetrical.

“You’re really warm. I can feel you from here.”

“Thanks.” _Probably warm from all this blushing._ Lance’s loud snoring soon filled both of Keith’s ears. Quietly, gently, and embarrassed, he escaped the room.

 

**…**

 

Keith was surprised to see that Lance was in the dining room for dinner, but apparently he found the way by himself. Everyone else was already there and Keith was the last to sit down. The normal chatter from the group ensued, until Lance opened his shithole- which he would defensively refer to as a ‘mouth’.

“So, what _is_ this shit?” He used both hands to gesture to the green slime sitting on his plate.

Allura gasped. “Language! Surely you have more manners than that.”

“Hm,” Lance hummed. “Nope?”

Allura just sighed, excusing his behavior on his previous healing pod imprisonment.

“Actually, I don’t know what this is either,” Pidge informed. Hunk nodded in agreement. Even though Shiro didn’t say anything, you could see it in his eyes- he had absolutely no idea what the food they ate was.

Lance started to prod at the substance on his plate. “Well, from now on I think I will refer to this as… slime man.”

Coran turned his gaze to Lance. “I’m sorry? I didn’t quite catch that last part.”

“What? I didn’t say anything… slime man.” Collective groans were heard from all around the table.  

“Well, if you must really know,” Coran started, “This is a traditional Altean plant, grown in our ship gardens.”

Everyone was shocked. “What?” Pidge said, “This is a plant? We have _gardens?_ I thought this goop accumulated in a cave or something- maybe even in Lance’s skull.”

“Hey! I’ll have you know that there’s probably a brain in here,” Lance pointed to his head, “and I think these plants are pretty cool. Thanks, Coran… slime man.”

“ _Oh my god._ ” Keith pulled down at his face in anguish.

Everyone ate their food peacefully, or as peaceful as you can get, with Lance saying ‘slime man’ after every sentence.

“Keith, you can get Lance ready for bed. I’ve got clean-up covered.” Pidge winked at him. _Pidge fucking winked._ They were on to him. Trying to keep a straight face, _hah_ , Keith put his hand on Lance’s shoulder, and used it as imaginary leverage to get up. He left the dining hall, assuming that Lance was following.

 

**…**

 

“Nn, I know how to brush my teeth.”  
  
“Good, then that means you know how to shower too. Bye.” Keith let himself out of the bathroom and sat on the chair in front of the desk. He knew three things at the moment- he was definitely blushing, seeing Lance tired was rare, and seeing Lance tired did things to his feelings.

Lance tried to sing through a mouthful of foam. “Haphnt you pheople efer hearth of clothing the gothmn door.”  

“You didn’t even get the tune right.” Keith felt slightly offended, “And don’t speak with your mouth full, it’s disgusting.”

“Sorry, mom.”

“Excuse me?”

“Oh, sorry _dadd_ - _”_  The pillow Keith threw hit hard enough that Lance didn't try talking again. 

He closed the door after getting one good look of Lance smiling at him, the lower half of his face covered in toothpaste. Soon he heard the sound of the shower turn on and some really off-pitch singing. Keith was exhausted from helping Lance all day, and all he could do was rest his head in his arms and contemplate his life choices. The man in the red jacket was _almost_ asleep, until the door burst open.

“Okay,” Lance said, “bedtime.”

Keith drowsily stood up. “ _Finally_. See ya.”

“Nope, you’re coming with me.” Lance all but dragged Keith to his bed with him. Sticking a leg out really far, he impressively flicked off the lights with his foot.

“But why?” Keith asked.

“I’m lonely, and you’re cute.”

_Oh my god. Oh my god- he just called me cute, and now I’m dying._ Keith just huffed as a response and closed his eyes. His legs were tangled with Lance’s, but he didn’t care enough to move. The room started getting hot, so he threw his jacket into the darkness and called it good.

“Psst,” Lance whispered, “do you think weed is still illegal in space.”

“I am not having this conversation with you.”  
  
“No- but listen to me. Who’s gonna catch you blazin’ it in space? The space police?”

“If Allura counts as the space police, then yes,” Keith giggled. The whole idea _did_ seem a little funny.

Lance gasped. “Oh my god, you should do that more often, man.”

“Do what?” 

“Laugh. It sounds beautiful.”

Keith couldn’t believe his shit brain right now- he couldn’t believe that he actually considered it- _oh wait,_ he still _is_ considering it. “... Maybe.”

“Good. You’re a cinnamon roll, too pure for this universe.”

Keith almost turned away to hide his flustered face, but then he remembered that Lance couldn’t see him anyway. He felt emotionally constipated, as Pidge and Hunk put it. “I’m still surprised that you’re being so nice to me,” he mumbled.

“What?” Lance drawled. “I can’t believe- I’d ever be mean to _you._ I promise to be nice… from now on...” His breathing had slowed and gained a steady rhythm.

Keith could’ve escaped like earlier, he could’ve left Lance alone once again- but he didn’t. He took a good hard moment to evaluate his feelings for the guy, until the comfort of lying next to him dragged him to sleep.

 

**…**

 

Keith awoke to Lance staring at his face. “Morning, shithead.”

“So you’re back.”

“I guess. Everything after getting out of the pod is fuzzy.”  

“Are you saying you don’t remember anything?”

“Nah, sorry.”

“...I see.” Keith pulled his knees up to his chest.

Now it was Lance’s turn to blush. “Well, I mean… I remember enough to understand why we’re sharing a bed.”

“Ah.”

Lance gave Keith a drowsy grin. “But don’t try bringing up the time I said I’d be nice to you. I have no memory of that whatsoever.”

 

**Author's Note:**

> i love dying and being dead  
> i don't write that often and this is my first fic on here so hello  
> thanks to [chloroophyll](http://archiveofourown.org/users/chloroophyll/pseuds/chloroophyll) for betaing and pointing out my tired mistakes ∠( ᐛ 」∠)＿  
> also you should totally read their klance fic [Closer](http://archiveofourown.org/works/7459812%20)  
> i cried


End file.
